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Wellness, Balance & Success for Business Owners: Happiness Is Right Now
There is No Getting Some Place.
Happiness/Contentment is right now. What you do in this moment creates your past and your future. Don't wait to create the life you want by hanging out in the past or the future. Focus and pay attention to this moment. This is the key to happiness. If you aren't happy now, you won't be happy in the future.
Multi Tasking
Multi-tasking is not being present. I know this all too well, especially from being a mother, wife, business owner, sister, friend, daughter, etc. I used to think multi-tasking made me a strong person because I could do so many things at one time. There is a difference between being present with a smooth flow when many things fall into place and multi-tasking out of chaos and not being present by trying to accomplish too many tasks at once.
Quality Time Being Present is Better than Quantity Time Being Somewhere Else in Your Mind.
We all want to be seen for who we are. It sounds so simple yet few people are present with another person during a conversation or interaction. There truly is only one moment, this moment. You can never get this moment back. If you have kids, this is vital to raising them to be content with themselves. If I could do anything different with raising my daughters, I would stop what I was doing, look them in the eyes, see them, listen to them, hear them and hug them. I would be present in that moment, not try to fix things or make things better. I was present with my daughters but much of the time my mind was thinking in the future about the next task. I was so hard on myself to be the best mom that I could. I spread myself way too thin trying to do all and be all. It would have been better to take time for myself and allow others to help. Don't wait, schedule present time now with your kids and don't do anything else when you have this time with them; no cell phones and no computers. Schedule slow down time for you and don't do anything else but to be present with yourself. Do this with any loved one. There is no better time than now.
Too Much on the Plate and Always Heaping More On.
This is something I do very well. My plate has been full my whole life with a long to do list. I finally realized I can't live life like this anymore. I have many creative ideas and want to do it all. I can't do it all at once. I created a tool to help me from piling more on my plate. Before I move on to the next task, I ask myself, "Am I complete with this task?" Many times I send myself back to wash my plate or clean my desk as I have already left it and gone on to the next task. I now like order and a place for everything. I know when I have filled my plate too full. I start having unfinished tasks and messes all over the place. Sometimes this is ok but many times it is a coping pattern and not wanting to deal with the present. Richard Carlson, author of Don't Sweat the Small Stuff said there will always be something in your inbox up to the day you die. He died suddenly at only 45 years old with stuff in his inbox.
Reprogram your mind.
The mind is like a computer. If you don't like what it is telling you, erase the words and reprogram them with inspiring words. This is where I have done my greatest work; on my mind. I wrote a book about it, Dream Seeds. Every time I had a thought putting myself down, I replaced it with a thought saying something good about myself. It took many years but one day I realized I didn't have the self defeating mind talk anymore. Talk to yourself like you would to a child, a pet, your spiritual leader or someone you respect. There is no difference between them and you, so why would you treat yourself as anything less? You will change the world and make it a better place by starting with respect and love for yourself. Then you can truly respect and love others.
Let your Emotions Flow through You.
I have changed my mind from unhappiness and depression to contentment and happiness. I think there is a misconception about happiness; that you don't feel sadness, anger or disappointment. To me happiness is contentment even in the midst of sadness. You embrace the sadness and soon it flows right through you. Life is a mix of of emotions. It is a joy to feel emotions. The irony is, as soon as you allow yourself to feel your emotions with no judgment, you can embrace them and move through them quickly. Children know how to do this very well until we train it out of them. If they are sad, they cry and they quickly move out of the sadness back to playing again. When we don't let our emotions flow through us, they stick inside our body and build up creating dis-ease.
Remember you are a Human Being not a Perfect Angel.
And when all else fails, remember to accept all the quirks of yourself, just as you are. Accept responsibility for the wrongs you have done and do what you need to correct them. Do not apologize for taking space on this earth. Years ago I gave up saying sorry when I was in the grocery aisle and in someone's way. I was doing nothing wrong. Saying sorry should be used when you have hurt another person and you take accountability for your actions. Each evening before you go to sleep replay your day in your mind. I review my day from that very moment all the way back to when I woke up that morning. Many times you will see all the good you did. If there is something you would have liked done differently, take note and do it different next time. Wipe your day clean. Tomorrow is a new day, live your day the way you want.
Too Much on the Plate and Always Heaping More On.
This is something I do very well. My plate has been full my whole life with a long to do list. I finally realized I can't live life like this anymore. I have many creative ideas and want to do it all. I can't do it all at once. I created a tool to help me from piling more on my plate. Before I move on to the next task, I ask myself, "Am I complete with this task?" Many times I send myself back to wash my plate or clean my desk as I have already left it and gone on to the next task. I now like order and a place for everything. I know when I have filled my plate too full. I start having unfinished tasks and messes all over the place. Sometimes this is ok but many times it is a coping pattern and not wanting to deal with the present. Richard Carlson, author of Don't Sweat the Small Stuff said there will always be something in your inbox up to the day you die. He died suddenly at only 45 years old with stuff in his inbox.
Reprogram your mind.
The mind is like a computer. If you don't like what it is telling you, erase the words and reprogram them with inspiring words. This is where I have done my greatest work; on my mind. I wrote a book about it, Dream Seeds. Every time I had a thought putting myself down, I replaced it with a thought saying something good about myself. It took many years but one day I realized I didn't have the self defeating mind talk anymore. Talk to yourself like you would to a child, a pet, your spiritual leader or someone you respect. There is no difference between them and you, so why would you treat yourself as anything less? You will change the world and make it a better place by starting with respect and love for yourself. Then you can truly respect and love others.
Let your Emotions Flow through You.
I have changed my mind from unhappiness and depression to contentment and happiness. I think there is a misconception about happiness; that you don't feel sadness, anger or disappointment. To me happiness is contentment even in the midst of sadness. You embrace the sadness and soon it flows right through you. Life is a mix of of emotions. It is a joy to feel emotions. The irony is, as soon as you allow yourself to feel your emotions with no judgment, you can embrace them and move through them quickly. Children know how to do this very well until we train it out of them. If they are sad, they cry and they quickly move out of the sadness back to playing again. When we don't let our emotions flow through us, they stick inside our body and build up creating dis-ease.
Remember you are a Human Being not a Perfect Angel.
And when all else fails, remember to accept all the quirks of yourself, just as you are. Accept responsibility for the wrongs you have done and do what you need to correct them. Do not apologize for taking space on this earth. Years ago I gave up saying sorry when I was in the grocery aisle and in someone's way. I was doing nothing wrong. Saying sorry should be used when you have hurt another person and you take accountability for your actions. Each evening before you go to sleep replay your day in your mind. I review my day from that very moment all the way back to when I woke up that morning. Many times you will see all the good you did. If there is something you would have liked done differently, take note and do it different next time. Wipe your day clean. Tomorrow is a new day, live your day the way you want.
Begin with Now.
It doesn't matter where you are or what you do, begin now. You can make a difference in your life and others lives just by being present to those you meet in your day and with yourself. Really see them for who they are and see you for who you are.
Begin with Yourself.
Your business will thrive when you thrive.
It doesn't matter where you are or what you do, begin now. You can make a difference in your life and others lives just by being present to those you meet in your day and with yourself. Really see them for who they are and see you for who you are.
Begin with Yourself.
Your business will thrive when you thrive.
Comment
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Comment by IBN Member Joan Morais on February 19, 2010 at 7:26pm
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Hi Kathy,
The upside to the multi-tasking and doing a lot is a trait of an entreprenuer. We are all in good company.
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Comment by Kathy Green on February 19, 2010 at 9:33am -
Joan, Thanks so much for this post, I too was/am a multi-tasker to the nth degree. It is in my nature to always be thinking of new things, learning everyday, and trying to do too much with too little time. I will definitely be coming back to this post when I need a reminder to slow my self down and finish what I am doing before moving onto the next task.
Kathy
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Comment by IBN Member Joan Morais on February 18, 2010 at 12:08pm
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Hi Robin,
I also do a lot for my family and noticed the connection of having way too much on my plate and overdoing for my family. Thanks for your comments.
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Comment by Robin Buerk on February 15, 2010 at 3:45pm -
Joan,
I really connected with the theme of your post. As go through the process of retraining myself to focus only on the task at at hand, I find I am also retraining the expectations of those closest to me who have gotten quite used to me being able to perform many tasks at once. Usually in their service! In time, I'm sure I will master this skill and they will become more independent.
Enjoy your day!
Robin
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Comment by IBN Member Joan Morais on February 15, 2010 at 3:14pm
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Tyrika, it is so true what you are saying. As women we are very hard on ourselves.
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Comment by IBN Member - Tyrika Swails - mainelement: love on February 15, 2010 at 12:46pm -
Joan this is an amazing post, thank you. Multi-tasking used to be something i would brag about, until I realized that I was doing many tasks but not accomplishing much. Undoing that way of life is challenging but I see the benefits with every mark I check off on my to-do list. Thanks for reminding us of our humanity. As women I think we forget that we don't have to be everything to every one all the time to be a great mother, daughter, sister, friend, wife, etc.
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Comment by IBN Member Joan Morais on February 8, 2010 at 1:55pm
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Thanks Lisa, Happy Day to you too!
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Comment by IBN Member Lisa Kasper on February 8, 2010 at 12:23pm -
Thank you for this!
I love the part about reprogramming our mind. This is something I am currently working on, and it was if you had written that straight to me! :)
Have a happy day!
<3
Lisa
Bramble Berry
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